A few days later, and what have I learned?
- You can know someone is being abusive, but it will still hurt.
- When something like this happens in a job negotiation to a woman, there will always be at least one or two well-meaning friends to ask her if she tried negotiating. It was worth it to me realize that they meant well and to fight down my indignation.
- Anxiety problems and abuse are not a good combination. It’s been tough these last several days.
- That department chair and his protege were so out of line.
- Yes, in 2013, there are still men who go on power trips trying to take advantage of women financially in professional contexts. Unbelieveable, but true.
- I still need feminism. We still need feminism. Oh my gosh, do we ever need feminism.
- I am fortunate in my friends.
- I have friends who are knowledgable about academic hiring who are willing to take the time to talk to me, reassure me, and advise me.
- I am still angry, and I expect to be for a while.
- Fair or unfair, the tenure-track hire in the relationship has more negotiating power in these situations than the person who would actually be doing the non-tenure-track job.
In case you never saw it, or forgot about it, enjoy Jon Stewart on Teachers and Wall Street.
And one more for shared outrage with my feminist friends: Saudi Arabia lets women ride bicycles, but only for fun, not for transportation. This is not from the Onion. This is real news. Yes, in 2013!